Showing posts with label Rory Delap. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rory Delap. Show all posts

Monday, 1 December 2008

Air raid warnings in Stoke-on-Trent


Stoke City's Rory Delap, aka The Human Catapult, has a new weapon in his armoury, a towel. Desperate to get a grip of the ball before its thrown like a torpedo into the 18 yard box to cause football's equilvalent to Armageddon, towels were placed round The Britannia at the weekend to help out Mr Slingshot.
The opposing force, Hull City, had a clever plan to counteract old windmill arms. They used that wily old performer Dean Windass in a clever destraction tactic.
As Mr Delap was winding up to throw the ball into the box, Deano just happened to be warming up as few feet away.
It seemed Stoke City's towel plan had been out-manoeuvred by those Tigers from the east, until the ref booked Windass.
That gave Rory a free rein to wreak havoc near the Hull goal. Innovation though is the key to Mr Delap's 40 metre throw being effective.
Perhaps, a towel may not be good enough to dry the ball. Should Stoke City put hairdryers around the ground? This might speed up the drying experience.
What about letting Rory put on Marigolds for extra grip or a pair of wicket keeping gloves...an air raid siren could also be effective.
It worked for little old Lincoln City for many years. As the home side took a corner the siren would blast out...opposing defenders would look to the heavens in fear of an approaching German bomber.
By the time they realised they were in 1999 and not 1939, Lincoln had scored...for more Stoke City news, pop along to The Sentinel....

Monday, 3 November 2008

Out-gunned in Stoke-on-Trent

In 1999 Alex Ferguson said those immortal lines after Manchester United won the European Cup with just seconds to go. They were: "Football. Bloody hell."
OK, they are hardly eloquent and wouldn't pass as great philosophy, but somehow it sums up what most fans feel every week of their life.
Here in Stoke-on-Trent we have had a touch of the Fergie's after Stoke City sent Arsenal packing at the weekend. Simply, Arsenal didn't fancy standing up to Stoke City, a team that may not seem fit to grace the high table of the "big four" but with passion and courage overcame their slicker opponents.
To put it simply, Arsenal, the Gunners, left the Britannia Stadium a bit shell-shocked after Stoke's not so secret weapon, Rory Delap's long throw, caused chaos in the Gunners' ranks. Just a couple of days' earlier he had delivered the same knock-out punch to hapless Sunderland. Ok, it's not pretty, but who cares?
One punter has already suggested that Fifa will get involved and ban long throws (!!!) because they don't want Stoke City to gatecrash the Premier League party and would rather they wallow in the depths of the Championship!
Should you be minded to read more, pop along to The Sentinel...